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VicariousE
Wanted to be a simple man of the Earth, enjoying art and literature, the bounty of the Earth. Instead, I have to fend against governments and principalities, global conspiracies and bad social engineering, ree, my autism

Age 51, Male/Penis

dillgent tryhard

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homeless/NE USA

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30 Days Left (and counting)

Posted by VicariousE - November 19th, 2014


After 30 days, the farm I've lived on (or next to) for 40 years, will pass to another immigrant family.  3 generations lived on this former apple orchard, many pints of blood split, many mouths fed.  I've got a 6 month lease ready to go on a rental house, and in those months, I have to find a permanent home... too bad it's during the dead of winter :\

Anyway, I' got 2 12' containers yesterday, and all my worldly possessions will go into them: books (8 milk crates), VHS tapes (more than 8 crates), furniture, tools, fabriaction materials (wood, metal), all the art work I've bought here over the years... in the end, I can't take it with me after I die, but it's nice to have toys and tools and cookery at hand.

Moving is kinda easier when you're young, and your stuff is modern and light, and there's not a lot of it.  More milage, more baggage I suppose.  The new owner wants to eventually tear these terra cotta and brick structures down, this is one of the 2.  There's a few old wooden advertisment signs in the middle, as a cattle/horse barrier.  I'll take photos of the inside once it's all cleaned out for the new owners.

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November 23rd Sunday morning Update:  About this time yesterday, before I woke up that Saturday morning, my brother sold my fathers green toolbox.  I specifically asked that it not be sold, but it was, so now I don't have any small or medium wrenches to work with.  There was never a complete set of anything in that small box (with stand), but it was our 'go to' box for tools, even after my father passed away.  I couldn't lift it, so I left it in an out of the way place, thinking no self respecting Californian would let a random citizen of New Jersey off the street, climb into a darkened, cramped box trailer 2 feet off the ground.

Anyway, I thought I was adult enough to be able to forgive and forget it, but when I woke up this morning, coughing and hacking from the cleaning I did in the kitchen last night.... I woke up very very angry.  It's never been more clear to me, that my older brother and sister have no empathy, that when they left New Jersey, they left all senimentality behind.  I'm still going to be the 'baby' of the family to them, subject to whatever preconceptions they have about me.

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November 27th (Thanksgiving) Update: It sucked.  All I needed was 20 mm socket for 1/2" drive, and my brother wouldn't borrow it from his friend, who was hosting us for dinner... I had other plans and wanted to get done replacing the brakes on the truck, plus I hadn't showered in 3 days, I was working in a wind chill of 20 degrees in wet mud :|  After I managed to clean up, I went out looking for dubious thrills and was left wanting... serious sinus headache from not taking any allergy meds :(

How many cats can you find in this picture (soon to be potentially homeless/caged/euthanized)?  I still haven't gotten all the Never-Seize off my jacket and fingers yet, but better more than less, when it comes to protecting bits of vehicle, exposed to the elements.... Man, those back rotors (the thing the brake pads rub against to slow the wheel) are shot, hardly any meat left and chunky rusty, might even warp under a hard brake O_O  Glad they're making them cheaper nowadays.

21 Days remaining.


November 30th Sunday Update:  (a PM excerpt)

: Cheers, be good and stay cool.
Damn.  No choice.  The ignitor on the forced air gas furnace took a shit tonight, almost set my fringe on fire trying to light it with a BBQ lighter -whoomp- only singed my hand hairs and scared me plenty.  The outside street lights' electric eye took a shit (They come out mostly at night, mostly), door doesn't close right, probably a few other things have gone wrong in the month my sister's been here.  Furnace next door got replaced Friday, my Pops last adjustment permanently turned the oil pressure up to 11, so it's days were already numbered.

I had a Chinese broad give me the hardest massage ever tonight!  No pain yet, it's amazing... every other back person I've went to causes pain afterwards, must be crappy Western medicine at work.  Ribs hurt like hell though, guess I'm not fully healed up from the motorcycle re-entry... with the iron in this soil, it's damn near like falling on concrete :)   Gotta respect good dirt, if you're a farmer.  It's just one of many titles I've gone by over the years: nerd, dark cloud, producer, janitor, laborer, camera operator, pipefitter, technician, jurist, editor, subject, sinner, author, screenwriter, wheelman, owner-operator, tax payer, employee, son, brother, boy and man.

19 Days....


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December 2nd Update:  This place sucks.  Who thinks Wite-Out white is a good color?  Not me, not by a damn sight.  So used to having decent wood panels and cabinents to look at.  I can't get fucked up enough to think this rental house will be tolerable, even over a period of time.  Anyone got any suggestions on how to improve this?!

And the strong mold smell is spicy, like old dog eggs with a side of green cough syrup from 1954, and that's a major concern.  UV-B/C wavelengths can destroy surface mold, germs, just about anything alive.  Ever look at a blacklight and your eyes start acting funny?  Exposure can cause serious eye and skin damage... so it must be great for disinfecting!  Only problem is, the price.  UV-C can't penetrate most glass, and selling a potentially dangerous product doesn't help with availability either... sometimes you see them along ceilings in food prep or hospital areas.

Fuck it, I will endeavor to persevere.  To that end, I have purchased components to make my last 6 months in New Jersey, a triffle easier.  Once assembled, these components will become a modern, enthusiasts' computer, a desktop PC, if you will.  The down side?  The local USPS postman is delievering the video card, not the UPS or FEDEX man |:  This guy makes the postman in Fraiser look trustworthy and reliable.  Plus he sucks at closing mailbox lids...


December 3rd Update:   I backed out of the rental house, gonna take a big hit to the wallet |: >:(  I can't sacrifice my health (and my stuff), to toxic mold.  WIth my sinus problem still unresolved after 4 fuck head ENTs......  Looking at a crappy condo a few miles away, hopefully be able to take the housecat too... almost too close to home, and we (sis and I) gotta be outta here on the 17th, so they can check things out freely without us being there, it's something required to close.  Another last minute change to the deal.  Again.  Must be a management trick by my sister to ensure last minute compliance from me.  Again. 

Getting played, fucks with my ego, but I'm remianing calm.  I'll get pissed off later, kill some 2D sprites, drive out to PA to find a permanent home, dull my senses... soon the worst will be past me, and my destiny can be mine alone to control.


December 11th, 11:11 PM EST/Pico Time:  Well, here I am again, in the garage next door, 280 feet closer to the AP (wireless access point).  I haven't had to travel down here since I figured out a way to use tinfoil and a saw, to cut an opening/line-of-sight, out of a tree, so I could send/recieve the wifi radio/internet.  Another long story....

I wish I had better news, there's been a classic 'change in the plans' and yet, everyone's wanting to get this done before Christmas before everyone decides to fuck off.  I've been told the farm sale still will likely go through, I still have my doubts, since the "Empire Strikes Back" change in plans, is enough to skunk the whole deal... and I'm the one in the hot seat, or rather, lack of a hot seat, especially now, in an unheated garage, standing at a makeshift table, with my broken latop in front of me, and my (also) donated LCD screen to my left.  Another long story, to those of you not familiar with my eariler posts.

I hate this waiting game, but I have little choice, as I've already lost so much in the leadup to this thing.  I've got just enough saved up to find a place for 6 months, which should be more than enough time to find a new home, and for the check to clear for the farm.... so I can buy a smaller one, in a state, far, far away.

There's more to say, some good some bad, no time |:  It's been a while since I had to stand in the cold, typing to the world using a name of my own creation.  My father was alive then, for one.


December 17th Update:  Today, I was not supposed to be here.  Today, the new buyers were entitled to have complete access to the property for 48 hours, at the end of which, they'd deposit the final payment, and the deal would be done.  Since they didn't do the second to last payment, the whole plan has been knocked into a cocked hat :p  Now they'll surely renegotiate a lower price, because they found things they didn't like in the soil... because money always matters |:

And I'm still waiting for a number of things to happen.  Told the real estate lady not to wait for me, if another offer comes along, I still might not be ready or able to move...


December 23rd Update:  Well my sister left the same day the farm was supposed to have been sold.  I've been told since, that the buyers want a 2 week extention, to 'review their options', which means: they can investigate the farm more, renegotiate the price, walk away entirely.  Whatever.

 

This concludes this newspost, it will not be updated further.  Moral of the story?  Money talks, and bullshit walks.


Comments

Your a trooper! I can understand it's hard to give up family land, never easy to do when many grew up there. At least you have the happy times and memories that happen, I can tell this farm seen some history! Hope all works out for you man and stay strong!

Thanks man! It's even more fun with my sister taking pictures of my stuff (so I don't steal from the 'estate')... and my bad back, the 8 kinda feral farm cats that are going to be left homeless. And the rent for the small house I'm going to, is atrocious, (1400$/mo) Doesn't even have a Certificate of Occupancy from the town yet, and really stinks of mold, but I have land all around me, so no noisy neighbors to wake me.

Aww It's so pretty! How can they want to tear it down??!!

The buyer works in cement, guess he doesn't like brick or terra cotta (clay block). Not right away, but eventually. There's a crack or two from rare NE earthquakes, last one was 3-4 years ago, and added a few more inches to the crack (the other building has a similar crack in the middle.) Besides, they were built to feed and house cattle, sheep, and the guy just wants to farm. There's a large pole barn too, so he's spoilt for choice.

does the rental house atleast have better wifi??

Hm, I seriously doubt whoever my new neighbor will be (only one house, not terribly close) so generous as to share their password. I'll just buy the thing, probably 50$ a month, just hope they don't want a year contract for that price..

If the town doesn't approve occupancy soon, I might have to go elsewhere. After you buy a place, the town sends inspectors to check for basic things. I could move in on Thanksgiving... who knows. But I've got the Rat Pack containers for a month, then it's just over 100$ a month rental... so I gotta get them packed and unpacked within a month, hopefully before snow |:

The internet service costs half of what a month of rent cost? not sure if cheap rent, or expensive internet...

More like 50 bucks per month, for cable internet; damn near 50 bucks for rent on the house, per day.

Damn that better be one hell of a house then.

It isn't, it's New Jersey, the most densely populated state in the union, Megacity #1

That sucks.

I know. 30 years ago, my folks would've scoffed at a hotel that charged over 50 bucks a night, now it's just over a hundred. Insurance is one of the bigger costs, when it comes to homes/property/health

Jeez, I'm sorry. Hugs.

Aw, thanks a lot hon :) At my age, it's probably for the best that I make my own way, instead of resting on the work of my ancestors... though I really, really wish my back wasn't hurting so bad.

I trust you're doing well, and being recognized (and paid) for your talents, have some turkey for me today!

Real shame about those terracotta treasure getting torn down (and toolbox), don't get how people would want to sacrifice a historical piece of architecture for anything else, even if the original foundation is not exactly how they envision it to be. Old buildings tell stories! Well, old people too; old anythings. :P Least it'll be preserved in picture!

Is that the main house in the background? Think this is the first picture I've seen of the farm. It looks homely.

That reminds me, gotta grab a few of those and a few bricks too, otherwise, it'll be treated as garbage :\ It's okay though, nothing man does is perfect, and time is the unrelenting predator in our rear view mirror... at least we have rear view mirrors...

Crap, I was supposed to zip up some pictures of the old place!

Whoah, some people out there just stink when they don't care about anything or anyone but themselves! Change is not always for the better, most people go through crap like this.

~~~
Happy Thanksgiving.

It's really a shame, I'm glad my folks aren't to see it, though it was their wish that everything be sold and split up between us 3 kids. I guess I inherited the best though: my mother and father's manners, morals, and determination. The rest of my father's family has been staying away, can only guess they feel as sorry as I do.

My bro and sis went to a friends house for Thanksgiving, not that far away. Since I was trying to fix the rear brakes on my Pop's truck, they left in his rental. All I needed, was what they sold/gave away, a stupid 20mm 6 point socket, 1/2" drive. My Pop had one, but it's gone now. My sister kept harping on about how, whatever I took, would be deducted from my 'split'.

I was never a hoarder like my father. And while he was terribly stubborn and annoying at times, I can understand why he collected: to aid others, and to aid himself. Because there are no guarantees in life. I had to make do with an adjustable wrench, glad it worked, and I didn't bang up the bolt head too badly, but I wouldn't wanna do it that way again, I shouldn't have to.

It would've taken my brother no more than a half hour to borrow his friends metric socket and return it to me. No shower in 3 days, my only jacket filthy and stinking of all the sour corners of the farms buildings. I just wanted to finish one thing, shower, and get my kicks on Route 66, not spend time trading anecdotes, with people from their generation. Too hedonistic. I mean, sure, I am terribly hedonistic (to my eternal shame), but I do that privately. In the real world, everyone's a friend I haven't met yet.

Meh, didn't mean to pour on the details, but I think I needed to write this down as a matter of 'public' record. Such as they are, I'm glad I still have my morals, my eternal gifts from my old parents. No one can take that away from me.

A mirage of rare views in our rear view mirrors! Indeed.

Yup, just gotta keep my eyes on the road, and ignore all those bad sights in the reflective plastic...

And now it seems I have to take 2-3 types of allergy medicine each day or my head will hurt, eyes will pus up and my ears will ring, damn can't win.

6 cats? I spot a couple more suspicious lumps, but hard to know for sure without zooming... what allergies do you have btw? Couldn't be fur allergy could it?? We moved to a house back in England that had had cats, and had carpeting; I walked around with an intensly stuffed nose all the time. Took a few years and a buddy with pets before they finally figured out what it was, and I could finally cure it and be free!

I'm assuming that's you in the new picture btw? This post is full of revelations!

Pretty sure it's 6. No idea what's feeding my allergies, though there's a weed outside that sets me off badly when its pollen's out. Could very well be the inside cat, but I don't hang out near it, and vacuum regularly. It might be its poop box, the cat litter is really dusty... Once that old cat dies, I'll know for sure. Just hope she survives the unheated truck trip to the new place, and gets used to her new environs. She's the only cat that's fixed and used to shitting in a box within a box (house), the other cats are wild... but young, they might be able to adjust to whatever awaits them...

Gray, cold day, just above freezing, major storm came through the day before.. the white house only detracts from the ick of it |: Rear disc brake is good, but it cost me a good Thanksgiving, and the last of my nerves.

Can you mail me that fluffy black and white one? Or all of them?

I think she's pregnant, and unmailable. Cats are bad at mass transit.

Well if you are allergic to fur even a thorough cleaning probably won't do much good, though I guess it all depends on how severe the allergy. Hope it's the weed then, when even that new environ will be cat-inhabited. :P Are there more wild cats than on the picture btw? I get why you have no vole problems now...

The human body has a stunning ability to recoup! Oh, you've been a producer too? And a jurist?! And a tax payer????!! You keep surprising!

It's mainly an untreated sinus infection run amok, previous to that, my allergies were seasonal and mild. Yeah there's about 9 or 10 all together, 2 got eaten by a racoon or fox, had to be put down for safety reasons.

I helped produce Johnathan Wrathbourne's Halloween 2 part thingy and Emily Youcis' upcoming movie segment... but I produced my own stuff back in the day, cost a bundle too, hope to get it digitized soon.

I take it that's you in the pic?? you look different than I imagined, I was thinking something along the lines of The Truth (grand theft auto: san andreas), maybe sporting a plaid shirt with a wifebeater underneath, long blonde hair, bandana, thin face with ghostly green eyes, perhaps some old-framed glasses (I remember you said said only wear contacts though) definitely a full beard....you need to work on the facial hair part atleast to fulfill my fantasies.

seems things keep crumbling on your end huh?? sometimes you just have to take what little life gives you. hopefully these 19 days will be a bit better. do you ever discuss your feelings with your siblings, jersey shore style?? you deserve way more respect from them for maintaining the family farm all these years...well, that's what California can do to you.

AHhahahaha, that's what I'm wearing now! Just took a selfie to prove it, though not blonde or thin faced, especially after I wake up in the morning. Ha, no... no facial hair, that was last century ;)

I've never watched any of those reality series based in this maladjusted state, and whatever I've said to my elder brother and sister, are taken 'under advisement'.

New Jersey style = puffing out your chest, rubbing nipples together
"ayy boy....you wanna buck son??"
it's a peaceful protest, you would think two muscular, highly confrontational albeit very high maintenance (spiked hair requiring a whole bottle of hair gel, spray tans, designer clothes) men would get into a fight, but all they do is indulge in borderline homosexual activities of rubbing nipples together
nonetheless, it shows that you are from New Jersey, and that you don't take sh*t from anyone mother f*cker...at the very least it makes for an awkward situation which they are sure to remember the next time they try to take matters "under advisement"
'course that may be a bit difficult to do, given your vertical challenges...or are your siblings about your height

Brother's 6'2, sis is 5' and I'm 5'4". But since I'm almost 20 years younger than them... doesn't matter, this will all be over with soon. Picking up the keys to the new place tomorrow. The accountant will meet me there to pick up my first rent check, and hopefully drop off a shit ton of papers, so I can get the utilities in my name.

that's quite a discrepancy in height!!
did your brother eat all you and your sister's vegetables growing up or something??
and ironically you turned out to be a veggie farmer lol

He fell into the septic tank, I stepped in a lot of shit... guess my sis missed out on the fecal acclimation.

*Sends orders to the Secret Police to 'detain' your empathyless hangers-on for 're-education'.

9_6

Also, 8 cats in the picture. Do I win a prize?

Hey man, how's it hanging? Yeah they could use a lesson in humility, all's it takes is one misstep, one natural disaster and POOF, you're out on your ass. Kinda hesitant to put up a picture of the new place, don't matter how pretty the outside looks, when the inside smells like moldy dog droppings :|

Think you're estimation is a bit high, and since I'm not a furry....

Cram school days in college. I haven't been able to do much online. Exams start on 8 December 2014 and end on 21 December 2014. I can actually feel my brains die.

I'm sure there's 8 cats in there. 3 of them are using Overlord-class optical camouflage and can only be observed at the planck-positron bounce layer(insert more technobabble here)

Also, deploying Predator MK-5 drone to monitor the movements of said postman. 9_6

Overkill? That's what I specialize in. :P

Lol, I used to listen to Overkill back in the day, "Toxic Load" was a good tune, cased in salty, messy euphemisms... Nah, 2 or 3 networked mini drones on yon postman would be more than enough - people are creatures of habit, and easy nail down. The UPS guy's getting a 5$ tip from me tomorrow, going to contact a dude I met at McDonalds one night a few months go, about burning me a legit copy of WIN7 and a course in how to keep MS out of it as much as possible.

I'm sure the cats off screen were trying to use my tools again, they're so damn smart. Guess it's inevitable, since they're eating dead cats and roadkill anyway... a while ago I read a study, where the winners of the mice maze were killed, and their brains fed to a mouse who hadn't run the course... after a day or two of digesting, they knew the maze, without ever having run it before...

White is a good color...it represents sterility. Good for your health.

Oh sh*t you had mold though...perhaps wipe down the place...with aromatic alcohols and other phenolic derivative compounds (in other words: disinfectant wipes) works in killing germs 99.9% of the time and is cheap. If only it was that easy though...still gotta get the cracks and crockery and hard to reach mold in between

Oh jesus didn't you already pay a lease though?? get any money back due to your circumstance??

I take it you cannot temporarily move in with your siblings...remember the thing I taught you about New-Jerseyian nipple rubbing if they don't comply...

why not move out to AZ, lots of people with health problems move out here- there are no natural disasters, clean environments in general, just valley fever and slightly higher than average STDs.

Ugh, that kinda white represents use and decay :p

Nah, that kinda smell is water damage, fresh and pervasive, no way to clean it out entirely... it's 2 days later and my sinuses are finally recovering :| Plus a lot of the basement is crawlspace with ancient dirt underneath, barely enough to get under it, let alone sterilize in time for moving in.

._.

Nah, my brother and sister have strange Californian spouses, best to stay away. All the other relatives in NJ are crammed into houses, they can't afford the mortgages on - not a good situation(s).

The north part of the State is nice, if a bit desolate... idk. Bad enough I'm going to have to consolidate my living space even further - looking at a 1 bedroom condo 6 miles away (another 6 month lease likely), just hoping I can acclimate to living around humans in close proximity.

Thanks for taking an interest, doctor!

Ohhh man, that has to be a bad smell. But the way I look at it is if it fits in the budget and nothing better is open for low cost of rent; I say take it before winter really hits. At least you will have a roof over your head. Best of luck good sir.

I'm hoping the tiny 1 bedroom condo becomes mine, too bad I didn't have the time to test the hugemongous ass flat screen in the living room... the previous lady who lived there left lots behind.

The moldy house was expensive (and gross and dangerous to living mammals), but with the condo, I'll have to keep renting the Pack Rat containers, till a permanent homestead is found. It'll cost about the same, I just might not have access to the bulk of my stuff :\

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